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Thanks for stopping by the bear cave and checking it out. Being serious all the time is un-bear-able, so we have added a great comic strip at the bottom of page for your enjoyment. Please feel free to leave your thoughts,or shoot us an e-mail with the link to the right. We'd love to hear from all the creatures in the forest.

Tuesday, July 31, 2007

Camping with Dad, or somthing like it!

Scruffy coyotes howl in the distant hills as majestic red tailed hawks sore over head. The day's sweltering heat gives way, as the cool night air warns of impending thunder showers. Our tired achy bodies yearn for the softness of our dusty sleeping bags. Here comes another night of spicy buttered trout cooked on the open fire. Our Dad is in his element, far from any five star establishment. When he says "roughing it" he means one step up from caveman camping. He gets us up at the first hint of the sun on the horizon. As the days flash by us, it is all we can do to keep up. Our dad does not know how to live life slow. The mountains are his home and it shows as the anxiety of his fast paced life sheds from him. Every tick of the clock, every breath, and every bead of sweat is relished, inhaled, as if he could squeeze out more of life's nectar somehow. What drives him? How do we always find a way to keep up with this man?

Being the daughters of a Marine Sergeant is nothing compared to being the child of a man who grew up in these mountains. He has guided, instructed, and facilitated numerous clients through life changing trips in these mountains. And now, he has decided to teach and grow us. These trips with dad have become more than the agonizing sagas we once perceived them to be. We find ourselves changed by the wilderness and learn how to overcome life's adversity. We have become thankful to have such a guide through these exhausting experiences, although we would have never chosen these lessons ourselves. Dad some how knows just how far to push, and when to stop and comfort. He is a hard man who cares more than his sun-baked, leather-necked face reveals. He brings us face to face with our vulnerability, yet we feel safe in our moments of insecurity. Fears subside into just another challenge to be embraced. We never realized that camping meant changing one's beliefs, nor did we ever think that we could accomplish what we have with dad by our side.

Robert Louis Stevenson

"To travel hopefully is a better thing than to arrive. "

Matt Marty

"Understanding is curing ignorance and curing ignorance is abolishing fear. "

Saturday, July 28, 2007

Does Time heal all?

I can not count how many times I have heard this phrase, " Time heals all". I do not think this is true. I do think time exposes much, and from that exposure we learn much, and that learning creates in us greater understanding about situations and people, and this understanding can heal. Recently my girls and I traveled back in time, well kinda. We took a trip to one of the ghost towns found in America; Bodie. It was compelling to look into the windows and try and learn about the people who once lived there. We could not help ourselves in the pursuit to learn about these past lives. This compulsive behavior to look into these windows made me think about a concept My consulting group teaches ; The JoHari window. We, as individuals, want to know about others and how we relate to them, or if we do. Maybe this seeking understanding of others is rooted in trying to understand ourselves, I do not know for sure.

As we walked around looking into the past, I realized that we spent more time learning about the past by looking into the bigger windows. The little windows just took to much effort and did not reveal as much. I began to make a comparison to these different windows and our behaviors as people. I formed an opinion that when we make our "open" window small, we just do not get much out of our time spent with others. I also began to think about those people around me that have made their "open" window large; I tend to spend more time with them, learning, sharing, and growing. As always, I began to ask myself, "what is it that drives us to create and maintain small "open" windows. I reflected back on a book I have just finished reading called "The Five Dysfunctions of a Team". As I ponder on these things I realize that we seemed to be seeking some form of acceptance through trust. Trust that we can be different but still accepted. The problem is that most of us run from the source that creates such things; conflict. We placate others to avoid uncomfortable feelings and the risk of rejection. We need to open our window, accept the difference of others and allow them to disagree with us, it is OK. Just because your window is small does not dictate that mine has to be.

Sunday, July 15, 2007

Choosing beyond our understanding

I am often amazed at the choices made in the days of our youth, and even in the years there after sometimes. We understand so little about this life, yet we make choices with tremendous consequences in the blink of an eye. Many of these choices that are made will cause ripples throughout eternity. Do we ever give a thought to that fact? Do we really understand the cause and effect of our choice?

I love it when we get a young life up high and have them sit down and look at the world they have been in for the past several days. Their little box of beliefs, paradigms, and dreams becomes so much more than it was a moment ago. Every once in awhile, I try and do the same exercise to myself. Stop, see, and sense the ripples of my choices. Often times, what brings me to this place is the harsh consequences of those choices: a fractured relationship, an unexpected death, or some other costly reprisal that life throws our way.

Do we ever really understand the myriad of consequences that lay beyond our choices? Can we honestly live with the responsibilities that are concealed in words like; lead, direct, prevent, intervene, cause, care, love, or hate? I have no answer for you here, only questions. I myself, am full of "what ifs" and "I should have", "could have" and "would haves". I frantically try to close every day out absent of regret, but to no avail. I have yet to really understand the multi-dimensional ripples, my choices create as they spread across sea of humanity. I constantly wake up with this nagging anxiety that I will waste another choice, not really understanding the weight nor the gravity, that choice will have on the life in front of me.

A boy sits with me as we talk about where we have come from and what the future holds. In a few months I will learn that a hard core gang member put a bullet in this boy's back as he walked home from Jr. High. Whatever ripples he was destined to make are done. Whatever understanding he may have thought he had, was disproved the moment that hammer slammed forward. Could I, or should I have made a bigger ripple when we sat together? My aching heart and tearful eyes wonder.

Wednesday, July 04, 2007

A Simple Truth

How can you be the difference? Check out this short film http://www.stservicemovie.com/

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