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Thursday, August 16, 2007

Should I stay, or should I go?

There are many times in life I find myself asking the question, Should I go, or more importantly, is it safe to stay. Being confident in a variety of skill sets has allowed me to push the edge and I have been rewarded for such steadfastness. I have also learned that mother nature is not one to play with. Enjoy it when she bears her sunny smile, but be warned when you feel that gloomy frown. Professionally we call it "risk assessment." If you have ever played chess you have experienced risk assessment on a small scale. If I take that piece they will take mine, and so on. Looking past the obvious and seeing the hidden. Assessing mountain storms, or any storm for that matter, is an exercise in risk assessment. There have been many folks who did not do such a good job at assessing the risk of a storm and ended up losing their life in the process. When mother nature starts to roar you have two basic options. Get the hell out of there, or find the best place to ride out the storm. Picking the best option has a profound impact on what you are going to do tomorrow. Recently I started to teach my kids about risk assessment as it applies to the mountains and to relationships. As odd as it may seem, I liken the two in this process. Seeing the tale tell signs that most folks miss is the game of assessing your probabilities of success. Mother nature gives us a heads up. And then she will pound the hell out of you if you have miss read her message. Heavy dark clouds, significant temperature drops, barometric changes, wind shifts, and a silent little message to that small internal voice of ours are all part of her warning.

But what about people and relationships? What are the warning signs humans give off about impending storms. This is a tricky endeavour because we tend lean more on what we hear then what we see or feel. The issues with people I think, is founded in the ever present threat of being misunderstood. The flash of angry lighting that comes from that fear tree I speak about. At some point we need to be asking ourselves, should I go. When things begin to go sideways, trying to ride out the human storm is a useless endeavour. Demanding, or pressing your position is not going to yield so spectacular shift in someone else's paradigms. There comes a time when we need to bail out and head for safer places. What kind of situations have you experienced? Have you ever stayed to long and suffered from missing the signs of the coming storm?


Anonymous said...

Human beings are so complex, from childhood onwards we love, we hurt, we feel rejection, acceptance, joy to name a few emotions. Relationships made my fallible human beings, maybe there doomed from the beginning?

I think the only saving grace we have is love. Love given in friendship and unconditional acceptance with forgiveness and a touch of tolerance thrown in. Add a dose of laughter and fun to lighten those difficult moments.

I don't have the answer. I think safe places are good sometimes and needed for regrouping, regaining strength.

I've felt both joy and pain with regard to relationships. This is some of what I felt from a low time in a very special relationship that I was afraid of losing...

In the prison of one
where can I go?
I wish to laugh and love
feel safe, feel at home.

Self imposed loneliness
the mirror reflects pain
I wish to share who I am
will you learn to love me again?

Daring once more
to overcome what was
gaining strength, pressing on
love and friendship, my cause.

Far from perfect
with a stubborn will
but my heart it is pure
will you be there still?

Talking Bear said...

Anon, I love your poem. Thanks for sharing. I would to post this on the main page, with your premission. Thanks again, TB

Talking Bear said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

Thanks, and yes, you may put it on the main page. :)

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