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Friday, February 15, 2008

"I just want you to know who I am"

The Scots and Irish wear kilts to let others know who their clan is. These families have taken great care in picking the colors of their tartans. The patterns are chosen with diligence and the cloth is treated with a certain reverence. If you were to make a tartan to represent who you are, of those character traits and principles that you think make up your personality, what colors and patterns would your tartan be

I think this question is a difficult question for most to answer, at least answer honestly. “Endlessly Restless” at the Dreams and Visions blog posted a interesting piece recently. This blogger asked a great question and started me to think about the color of our soul. My mind went through several analogies playing with this question. I thought about the building of a house compared to our inner being. My thought process took me to the beams that support many parts of a house and I thought about the beams in terms of character traits that support who we think we are. From there, I came to the tartan and the many colors of such a noble cloth

I left a post for “Endlessly” about how I had to come to grips with a color I know my tartan would have. That color is black. Black because I know I have a dark side; a side that as grown through life’s hardships. At first, I associated this color with sin. Then I realized that black is not the absence of color, but the presence of all color. It is the accumulation of all that I am both good and bad. It is what frames all of my other colors. I started to think about my colorful beams of character and pondered about the fact that although these beams are present, can others really see them or are they buried so deep inside me that they go unnoticed? What color would I use to represent such important parts of me.

As I took this fun journey of thought, I started to think about why this would matter. I realize that all of us want to be known for who we are. We want others to see past our brokenness and embrace our fragmented soul. I want someone to tell me that my life matters, that I am doing right by them. I want to be loved, and to love. I want to feel important. I want to wear the color of my soul like a tartan so others know that their life matters to me and that they are important

But all too often, I just go on living life making everyone guess what the colors of my soul are and wondering if any of it matters? This is my regret


1 Comment:

Peajay said...

Those that don't know the colour of your soul TB are too blind to see. I don't believe your tartan or your soul to be black, I believe it to be woven with threads of light. If those who doubt it don't look then they won't see.

Another possibility, have you considered pink, it's good to be in touch with your feminine tartan now and then! :p

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